One thing I have learned
You must always turn back towards your spouse after an argument. Even if you are still hurt, even if you don’t come to a complete understanding or agreement. The more times you do this, it will get easier and faster, and you will be able to communicate better. It is a muscle you must develop; an absolute for a marriage of depth. Eventually the muscle will almost respond automatically for you. If you keep your back towards your spouse, you will be taking steps farther away, a direction you really don't want to go. Can you hear someone more clearly when they are standing facing you or when they have their back to you?